Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Random Dozen - One Thing

1. What is one really fast, know-by-heart "go-to" meal to fix in a pinch?

My "go-to" meal is a salad. I always have salad stuff and it is fast and healthy and I love them!

2. What is one item you won't leave home without. (Purse and license do not count.)

Earrings - I am "naked" without them.

3. Where is one place you never tire of visiting?

The BEACH!!!

4. Share one factoid of your family's history.

In the 1800's my great great great grandfather was born in a covered wagon in Tennessee. He then moved to Oklahoma as a Methodist Preacher/Circuit Rider. Now, we live out here. I was so surprised to find that there is a HUGE Bennett Family Reunion in Oklahoma. How neat is that?

5. Complete this sentence: "Once upon a time I ...."

.... wanted to be a princess... - wait I STILL do! Okay then .... lived in a land far away where the waves hit the sand and the sun shone brightly and the weather was WARM!

6. If you could win a one year's supply of anything, what would it be?

The practical thing would be gas for the cars. ... however, not known for practicality, I would choose FRUIT! Yeah... all kinds... yummmmm

7. "One quirky thing you may not know about me is ...."

I enjoy mornings and nights - not so much the middle of the day. I could sleep for hours during the day, wake up real early and love to stay up real late.

8. You have one dollar in your pocket. What will you buy?

A Cliff bar...

9. "One thing that always makes me laugh is ...."

My grandkids.. (okay, so that is 7)

10. What is one thing you could do today to help yourself reach a personal goal?

Study Medical Terminology for my ND.

11. What is one thing you could do today to bless someone else?

Smile... actually, pray for them

12. What is one thing you're looking forward to soon?


Psalm 84:10a: Better is ONE day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Weekend Battle/Joy

This past weekend I did something that I rarely ever do. I stayed home from Oz alone.

Through the years I have allowed hurts and rejections and just stuff to build up. It was beginning to choke me and drown out my joy. I was to the point that I could not function.

About a month ago Hugsum and I had gone on a date to a concert. I should have been happy and joyful and enjoying it. I was not. I was on the verge of tears. I could hardly hold them in. I finally looked at him and said, "I have to have help".

This past year has been a hard one. I won't go into details, but I'll just say that I have been stripped down to the nubs emotionally and spiritually. I have been beaten up ... There have been so many battles on so many different fronts that I just completely closed up my emotions and did my best to make it through the day. I would fall into bed exhausted at 8.

I did not know how to handle any of what was going on and there was nothing that I could do about the outcome of anything - except pray... which is exactly what I did. I was numb and didn't feel anything, but I prayed.

So last week I just announced that I need to stay home. I needed to get Face to face with God. I HAD to have His touch and His healing.

Thursday night I had a dream/vision of a banner running through my head. It said, "I came to heal the broken hearted". It was in different fonts and colors... continuously changing.

I began to stand on that vision that my heart, which had been broken, would be healed.

I spent all day Saturday and most of the day Sunday in prayer and Bible study. I repented, I forgave, I was forgiven. I talked and prayed and shared with Father all that I could think of... everything that was in my heart and on my heart and He touched it and removed the pain. I was healed from the inside. I was healed from the hurts and pain.

By the time Hugsum got home, I felt free and had a deep joy. He said he felt like he had a new wife. It was wonderful!

I came to the point that if nothing about any of the circumstances changed, it is OK. I can live with it. I HAVE to live with it because it involves other's decisions. But the point is that I can live. I had been so depressed, so broken, so despondent that I didn't really care if I lived or not.

Please don't judge me. I have hope of my salvation. I was not about to take my life. I just did not want to live like I was living with so much grief and pain.

The circumstances did not change. I was changed!

I love that now I know that Jesus is enough. I don't have to worry. I don't have to fret. I don't have to be careful about what I say or do or think. He is enough. He can handle it all. He has restored my hope and my joy and renewed my purpose.

Can I tell you... that is such a relief and such a blessing! I wonder why I didn't do this sooner. Well, actually, I had not come to the end of myself. I had not bottomed out. I was still trying to "hold on" and figure it all out. I had to give up.

How nice it is now to not be burdened with grief and guilt and condemnation and striving to please.

Jesus is truly all I need!

Now... as a side note - I'm still far from perfect. I still blow it (I did yesterday). I still have to work through some issues. However, I am confident in the knowledge that no matter what, I am okay. I am going to be fine. I don't have to worry.... I can get back to that place. I know where it is and how to get there. I know the Answer!

ahhhhhhh, now THAT's the life worth living! I think that I'll enjoy my pool and the sunshine and the grandbabies and their parents that I can.

I love my life!

Friday, May 7, 2010

Because there is LIFE

So, I have felt absent from the world lately. I have not blogged much. I have not posted much on facebook. I rarely look at twitter. I don't even email much. I rarely talk on the phone except to the kids.


Good question. I'm so glad you asked...
I'm living life. I'm developing relationships with the grandkids....

I hope you are having a good life without me... I'm enjoying mine!