It's How You See...

This was our long weekend at the church. On Friday night after our dinner I was visiting with my precious little 90 year old friend. (she's the one who made me the 12 foot long afghan for Christmas) She was so excited because she had had cataract surgery on her left eye that day and could see to crochet without her glasses. This week she is to have it done on her right eye.

We sat and talked and shared and crocheted, just enjoying each other's company. She was amazed at all she was seeing and how well. She hadn't been home after the surgery, but had been out shopping and visiting with friends and then come straight to the church.

Sunday morning when I got to church I went to greet and hug her. She wouldn't look at me and kept turning away. I asked how she was. She was so upset. She said she didn't want me to see her face. The doctor had messed it up when he did the surgery and that side was full of wrinkles! She said the other side wasn't like that (she still can't see out of the other eye) and she was truly distraught!

She didn't think she would have the other eye done because she didn't want him to wrinkle up the other side, too.

I tried to be sensitive and not laugh. She had just not been able to see for so long, she didn't know she had all those wrinkles! I told her she was beautiful and it looked just fine.

The truth is, the doctor did not change her face, just her vision!

There is lots to be learned here...

When we expose ourselves to the Light of God's Word, we will see things differently. Now we see through a glass darkly - almost like we have spiritual cataracts... but when the Holy Spirit opens our eyes we see how dirty and wrinkled and messed up we truly are. The good news is that He can clean us up and fix us!

Whew!

I pray that I'm not blinded by dim vision at the truth of who I am. I want to glow in the truth and knowledge of who He is and what He wants me to be. I know I have blind spots... I want them cleaned up because even though I can't see them, other people can. Like my friend's wrinkles. She was embarrassed when she saw them, even though the world has seen them for many MANY years.

I realized that just because I don't see or know something it doesn't mean that it isn't there. It just means I haven't seen it. When I do see it, then I need to fix it - or allow it to be fixed. I also realize that just because I see something in or on others it doesn't mean that they see it. They may be blinded to it. I need to pray for them instead of judging or criticizing them. If I expose it, I can't fix it. I don't have that power!

So glad that Jesus is the fixer! He is kind and loving and thorough! Washes us white as snow and removes spots and wrinkles!

Guilt and Other Unnecessary Emotions

Have you every wondered why sometimes you feel so guilty and it isn't even your fault? Well, I guess I should personalize it, but then someone would think that I'm speaking personally - and I'm not.

Recently I was having a discussion with a friend about her son. He was making and had made some bad decisions. She was feeling guilty. Like she was to blame and it was all her fault and "if only" she had been a better mom, or taught them more, better or earlier or if she had not done yadda yadda ...

You get the picture. The truth is, she was a good mama. She gave her love and attention and training to her children. She was not perfect - none of us are. We all make mistakes and have regrets. But... God can cover those mistakes if we trust Him and ask Him.

I felt so badly for her. I tried to tell her that while they were under her roof and she was paying the bills, then she was responsible for them and their actions - AND she had a say so in what they did or didn't do. Once they left her home, they were then responsible for their own actions. They had to pay the piper themselves. It was no longer up to her.

Sometimes as parents, we may not approve of or appreciate or like what our children do or don't do. We can voice our feelings (and we should do so in love and respect). But, we have to understand that it is no longer up to us.

They will suffer the consequences themselves. We would LOVE to prevent and stop their hurting. But, I realized that I grew up when I faced the music for my decisions. We grow in the hard times. We need to allow the children to grow and develop strength and character.

It is important to keep the lines of communication open so that when they need us, we are there to love.

I told her that it is a hard lesson to learn as a parent. It is painful. But, it is also very freeing when we realize that we don't have to feel guilty for our children and what they do or don't do. It is important not to let their behavior determine our behavior.... or think it is a reflection on who we are or have been as parents.

I hope she heard me. I hope she applies it. She was feeling unnecessarily guilty. It is normal to feel that, but we are above "normal". Besides, it harms the relationships. It keeps us in bondage and them too. (if she didn't, then I can't feel guilty or bad - I can just love her anyway!)

(Because we don't feel guilt does not mean that we do not hurt for them - we just remove ourselves from the responsibility.)

... the other emotions it evokes? pride, anger, hurt, unforgiveness, frustration, confusion, pain, strife.... just to name a few.

Those are not worthy of entering into a family relationship of love, respect and honor!

I want to reiterate that this is not about me and my family lest someone takes it that way and I feel guilty...

A Month has gone by and DAX!

It is hard to believe that it has been a month since I posted anything on my blog! What used to be a daily ritual has now become almost non-existent! I rarely even open it, post, comment or read! How sad is that? I do plan to be back regularly, though.

My computer has been acting strange and it throws me off line constantly - or I have no connection. That makes it very frustrating and character building! That explains part of why I have been blog-absent. The other part is life... just dealing with things and people and moods and well, just living.

BUT, I have had a great and fun month with grandchildren. The MOST precious, sweet, loving and wonderful people on this earth. They bring me so much pleasure and joy!

Speaking of... we have had answered prayer and a blessing. My wonderful daughter-in-law has been carrying our 6th grandchild. She is tiny, so this has been a hard process for her. She was all baby and it was questioned quite frequently whether she would make it to the scheduled C-section date of July 17 ... which was 2 weeks before her due date.

Everyday I would watch her and question her. She believed that she would make it and we were right there with her.

She ALMOST did! Yesterday, July 16, 2009 at 8:31 pm our precious little Dax Edward Posey made his loud appearance! Before he was all the way out he was screaming! Weighing in at a HUGE (for his mama) 5 pounds and 8 ounces and 18 inches long! Perfect and whole in every way!

Here are a few pictures! We had cameras and phones flashing all around...

This was my first good look at him...

Here he is after they gave him a good bath and washed his hair. I guess he is already all boy since he didn't like that at all! You can tell by the look on his face!

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Here is his proud daddy holding him - can you see the big smile? Yeah, we are all very happy!

Thanks for your prayers for our family!

Now, we have #7 due in January.... God is blessing!

Georgia

We are in Georgia a few days visiting my family. It has been nice to be here with them. It has been humbling to be able to serve them for a few days.

Last week I was able to harvest some of my garden goodies... here is a picture of my first harvest! I know you are so impressed with the bounty! On Sunday night before we left I even pulled 3 ears of corn to have for supper! Yeah... just call me farmer Merrie!

Also, before we left I had one day of getting time with ALL the grandchildren! What an extraordinary blessing! Yes, these five give me life and love and joy unspeakable!

I'll be back home soon. Just wanted to share my blessings!

More Kate Sayings..

So, today we were going to Walmart. I was feeling pretty good because I had gotten up and washed and fixed my hair. I had my make-up on and a "cute" outfit. You know the feeling. You just feel good. Especially since the last couple of days my hair had been a mess and I was wearing some not so cute outfits.

Kate was in the back in her seat. She said, "Grandmamama, what did you do to your hair?"
I said, "I fixed it. Do you like it?" Thinking, she was going to tell me it looked nice.
She said, "No, it doesn't look good. You need to let it grow long so it will look better."

Then she was talking about Superman. I asked if her daddy was like Superman. She said, "ummhuh... he wears one of those blue flying things on his back". (funny, I haven't seen that cape since he was about Kate's age...)

We never know what she will say, but we do know it will be cute and make us laugh at ourselves!

Wordless Wednesday (just kidding)

My world....


This is Noah ... he is three

This is Kate ... she is three

This is Kendall ...she is two

Kendall and Posey

This is Grace... she is one

This is Posey .... she is 8 months

Yes, I'm blessed... two more wonders on the way..... yippee!

Things About Me That You Might Not Need To Know....

This is Kate... the picture is over a year old... but, she looks just like this still, not much bigger! She is three now. I have been keeping her and she keeps me on my toes. Here are a few of the things she says to me... they keep me humble.

As we were working in the yard one day she wanted to use my "shover" to dig some.

When I don't get the movie going she tells me, "Grandmamamama, THAT'S not right!"

Oh... all the extra mamamamama's are for me. Her Grandma lives in Michigan and so sometimes just to make sure she's talking to the right one she adds a few more ma's.

One day we were going over the parts of the body... this is your nose, knee, foot, etc. I would show her on her and then on me. So, I showed her the calf. She looked at her tiny leg and then my big leg and just said, "you have more calf than me".

We love to go to Chick-a-lay... not Chick-fil-a... (Noah calls it Chick-for-play)

Yesterday we were "swimming" (meaning jumping and standing on the steps while holding tightly to me). She got cold so I scooped her up and wrapped her in a towel to warm her up. She was looking at my neck and got this horrified look on her face. Through clinched teeth she said, "Grandmamamama, what is that on your neck?" I laughed and said, "oh, it's just a mole. Does your daddy have moles too?"
She said, "yes, but only YOURS stick out like that."

Another day we were sitting on the sofa watching a movie. She looked over at me and smiled real big so I smiled back. She said, "Grandmama, you have orange teeth". Then went right back to the movie.

She will also run through the room and say, "Grandmama, I love you so much! So VERY much!" Yeah, that will certainly melt me.

Today Grandaddy was working in the back yard and took his shirt off. Kate said, "GRANDADDY, you have BIG muscles on your back, around your waist!" She was sincerely giving him a complement! Gotta love it!

She is always giving us facts and information that makes us laugh. At the ripe old age of three, she is an expert on everything!

More later....